It’s time to take another journey into absurd horror with the crew of RiffTrax.
This is the tale of a man who transforms into a violent lizard creature whenever he’s in the sun too long. No, he’s not the third wheel love interest in an upcoming Twilight reboot, he’s The Hideous Sun Demon!
It’s the late 50s, a time when exposure to radiation still caused fun stuff, like superpowers and shape-changing, as opposed to less fun stuff, like, y’know, death. After some radioactive material falls off the toy train the scientists use to transport it through the lab (actual plot point, not a joke) mild-mannered genius drunk Dr. Gilbert McKenna is changed forever. Sunlight turns him into a reptile man-monster, presumably because that’s the rubber suit that was cheapest to rent when they made this movie. But not cheap enough for them to rent the bottom part of the suit, apparently, because he runs around in totally soaked khaki pants for roughly half the movie. Why are his pants so wet? That’s just part of the mystery!
It’s a superhuman dose of old-fashioned nuclear mutation fun, stay out of direct sunlight and join Mike, Kevin and Bill for The Hideous Sun Demon!
There are good movies, there are bad movies and there are movies that defy description. Santa Claus and the Ice Cream Bunny could cause brain damage, The Room is akin to watching someone blissfully unaware of his nervous breakdown, Miami Connection excels at bad music, questionable dialog and insane action while Sharknado is… Sharknado.
Luckily we have the fine folks at RiffTrax to assist in making these movies a little bearable. Below is the schedule for 2015’s RiffTrax Live performances. Select cinemas will be showing these ‘movies,’ giving fans a chance to watch the RiffTrax crew work their magic live.
It’s Friday night. You’re bored and Saturday night can’t come quickly enough for Doctor Who. What better way to fill the time than with a long forgotten story depicting the most exciting adventure of the world’s greatest detective?
… or a hilariously awful Batman serial.
Here it is, at last, the FINAL EPISODE chronicling Batman’s struggle against the Wizard! The suspense is thick, and everyone’s wondering: who will prevail and be victorious? Will it be the nefarious Wizard or — wait, oh come on, it’s right there in the stupid title! That’d be like titling the Seinfeld finale “They wind up in jail” or the Lost finale “Don’t bother watching.”
One thing the title doesn’t give away is the identity of the Wizard, most likely because the writers of the serial didn’t get around to deciding who that would be until they started shooting the final scenes of this episode. Is it the old occasionally-in-a-wheelchair guy? Or occasionally-in-a-wheelchair guy’s butler? Convenient-provider-of-exposition radio guy? Vicki Vale’s dead brother, who everybody seems to have completely forgotten about, including her? I think we all know the real answer: Gabe. Gabe, you beautiful mastermind, you’ve been pulling the strings all along! Bless you, sweet prince.
The world, characters, music, even the sound effects of the Mario video games are among the most iconic entertainment creations of the 20th century. So naturally if you made a Mario movie, you’d want to abandon everything that people liked and recognized about them, and then just in case people were still willing to give it the benefit of the doubt, throw in The Happening star John Leguizamo.
Let’s say you went to the cinema hoping to see your favorite character from Mario 3, the red carnivorous fish Big Bertha. Ignoring the fact that you are a moron for your favorite character not being the King of Ice World when he’s been transformed into a seal, you might be disappointed to to learn that in the movie, Big Bertha is instead a large, violent woman with prodigious cleavage who wears S & M-esque garb. (Or maybe you’re into that. In that case, you’re probably not welcome in many of the theaters that were showing Super Mario Bros.)
So Big Bertha isn’t a fish, the goombas aren’t tiny, stompable, sentient mushrooms, and there’s nary a Tanooki suit to be found. No big deal, as long as the Mario Brothers are still brothers, right? What’s that? For no apparent reason Luigi is the adopted ward of Mario? Well, maybe it could still work as long as the movie isn’t an incoherent, hideous mess full of shouting and chaos and cheap sets and… Why are you shaking your head sadly?
Strap on your Kuribo’s shoes and join Mike, Kevin, and Bill up on Jugem’s Cloud for riffing on the best live action Mario property that doesn’t contain Captain Lou Albano.
From as far back as the first Turkey Day marathon I watched almost non-stop 30 hours of bad movies (I think I passed out during Catalina Caper) in 1991, I have been a devoted fan of MST3K. Sadly, the program is no longer on the air and what was once a time-honored tradition is a thing of the misty beleaguered past.
Until now!
EW is pleased to announce that MST3K creator Joel Hodgson is hopping on board the Satellite of Love once again to program the return of Turkey Day. Shout! Factory, who have been doing a stellar job putting out MST3K on DVD, is helping to celebrate the show’s 25th anniversary with a Turkey Day Marathon, curated and hosted by Hodgson. Beginning at Noon Eastern on Thanksgiving Day, fans will be able to log on to MST3KTurkeyDay.com for six glorious, classic, Sampo-filled episodes of Mystery Science Theater 3000.
As a Whovian, I had long detested the Peter Cushing Dr. Who movie. I was coming into the mythology and learning all of the factoids and characters only to discover there was an actual big budget movie I had never heard of before! One exciting Saturday afternoon, I tuned in to some UHF channel and was shocked and confused by what I saw. The hero’s name was clearly Doctor Who, he built a time/space machine in his backyard and he was a doddering fool!
Visit the UK Peter Cushing Appreciation Society for more startling images
Sure, the special effects were impressive and the production value is astounding but… it is so very goofy and despite the fact that it follows the plot of the Terry Nation/David Whittaker TV script from 1963, it is also far removed from the tone of the original. Many years later I grew more refined and can appreciate the merits of the feature film and especially the incredibly versatile Peter Cushing. Not only do I own the films on DVD, but I own a special limited edition set complete with a film cell. I am also the proud keeper of very rare talking motion picture-Daleks which include dialogue from the movie. So I have come around.
Even so, I have to admit that it’s ripe material for riffing by Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett. The fact that the RiffTrax crew include a Jon Pertwee line shows the appreciation for the source material and a real flair for some superb jokes.
As Doctor Who is at the height of its popularity, there is no better time to revisit this gem… and lampoon it to high heavens.
Please remember Dr. Who is not a medical doctor: He has a PhD in mincing around in a phone box only!
ATTENTION, WHOVIANS! (For the uninitiated, that is not something Jay-Z yells at the beginning of a song, it’s a name for Doctor Who fans)
Before Matt Smith, before David Tennant, before Christopher Eccleston, before even the scarf and afro guy, there was Peter Cushing. Well, not before, exactly, because this feature-length movie isn’t a canonical part of the Doctor Who universe or storyline. So it’s sort of more adjacent, than before. It’s nearby, if nothing else. Approximate, at least. Like, Dr. Who is in it! But instead of a mysterious Timelord alien, he’s kind of just a confused human grandpa with the last name Who. But he does have a TARDIS! Of course, instead of a disguised alien craft it’s just, like, this junky thing he made with his granddaughter. Oh yeah, he hangs out with his granddaughters. Yeah. But then they travel through space and fight the most classic Dr. Who bad guys of all, the Daleks! Of course, in this imagining of Dr. Who, the Daleks are just some dopey trashcan looking guys with plungers sticking out of ‘em that talk funny — oh, that’s how they still are? Seriously?? PERFECT! IT’S CANON AFTER ALL!
So no matter how much you know, don’t know, or don’t want to know about Dr. Who, this movie will fill your needs. Plus, the RiffTrax itself is totally canon, and an official part of the Mike, Kevin, and Bill timeline (unlike that regrettable one-off TV special, “RiffTrax goes to Hawaii”, which shall never be spoken of again). Exterminate Dr. Who and the Daleks today!
Still riding a high from seeing Best of Rifftrax Live! Manos: The Hands of Fate. Next week I am taking in Plan 9 From Outer Space for all it is worth. Christopher Walken may be the cult actor of the millennium today, but before he appeared in Pulp Fiction he was just another amazing actor who appeared in questionable films… like this (what am I saying? He is still the class A actor of Deer Hunter who performs in flicks like Seven Psychopaths). I love him, but I have to shake my head at 90% of the movies he turns up in.
McBain is 100% 80’s angry action movie complete with villains who fly through the air when they are shot like murder is some kind of fun fest for clowns. It’s all very weird.
Click to order the riff!
WARNING! Contains naughty language and Christopher Walken impressions!
Let’s get this out of the way: Yes, this movie is called McBain. No, it has nothing to do with what you’re thinking: it’s not a biopic of Diane McBain, star of the 1960 TV series Surfside 6. Oh, or that Simpsons character either.
No, there’s no Mendoza for McBain to take out in this one. That’s just in the silly movie series The Simpsons came up with. Probably only took them a couple minutes too. Mendoza…Ha! This McBain is much more legitimate and creative. Its drug dealer is named Escobar.
Christopher Walken (Mousehunt, Joe Dirt, The Country Bears, Gigli, Kangaroo Jack) stars as the titular McBain. When the man who rescued him from a POW camp is executed by a Colombian dictator, it’s time for McBain to put together a ragtag group to avenge their friend. He rounds up a smooth talking technology expert, a black guy who is afraid of flying, and a guy who repeatedly asks him if it’s really a good idea to rip off The A-Team so blatantly.
Finally, they’re ready to take out the dictator and what follows is possibly the most incoherent mess of an action film there ever was. The body count soars, plot threads are introduced and discarded at a moment’s notice and a WrestleMania hat is given prominent screentime. Evidently, nobody ever told the producers of McBain that 80s action flicks were out of style, or that it’s not very badass to make your supposed action hero a welder (McBain is a professional welder, we forgot to mention that until now. Also, his first name is Bobby. Both of these things are true.)
McBain is the movie that will have you saying, “Seriously? Christopher Walken did this only three years before Pulp Fiction?” Join Mike, Kevin, Bill and Rainier Wolfcastle for McBain: Let’s Get Silly.
Dancing sugar plums, propositioned reindeer, screaming nightmarish imps and a drunken bleary-eyes Santa Claus at the bottom of the chimney… it must be Christmas.
What do ice-skating reindeer, pipe-smoking santas and a parade of aquatic champions have in common? You’ll see them all in the RiffTrax Live: Christmas Shorts-Stravaganza, now on Blu-ray! The stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000® have a sackfull of delightful and demented shorts to riff live onstage. Some of the forgotten gems of Christmases past prove to be the perfect targets for the rapid-fire riffs of Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett. And if that wasn’t enough, they’re even joined by comedy legend “Weird Al” Yankovic for a musical short about the wonders of pork! It’s funnier than Ernest Saves Christmas and far less creepy than The Polar Express!
Join Mike, Kevin, Bill and Al for a festive night of hilarious holiday comedy that is destined to become traditional Christmas viewing.
We’re happy to present the first ever RiffTrax Christmas special! In the spirit of the season (that is, delusional hysteria and madness) we’ve dug up some hilariously bizarre holiday oddities!
Join your hosts, Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy, and Bill Corbett, as they:
*Exchange gifts, with vintage toy commercials
*Riff an insane vintage cartoon, The Shanty Where Santy Claus Lives
*And riff the main event, Magic Christmas Tree!
Magic Christmas Tree is a fresh slice of holiday weird, sure to bring back cherished childhood memories. Remember how your parents used to tell that old Christmas tale of a boy who hit his head trying to help a witch retrieve a cat named Lucifer, hallucinated for months, and befriended a creepy, sarcastic tree? No? Well that’s probably for the best, you were a young, impressionable child. But you’re ready now!
Featuring half-man/half-jaw actor Miguel Fuentes, a.k.a. the Aztec from The Pumaman!
Click on the image to order!
There are lots of theories about why ships disappear in the Bermuda Triangle. Some blame magnetic anomalies affecting navigation. Some cite alien abduction. Others point out that it’s actually just a huge amount of ocean, and of course you’re going to lose some ships out there, you nitwits. But the makers of The Bermuda Triangle have their own fresh theory, and it all comes down to something NEVER BEFORE SEEN IN A HORROR MOVIE — a creepy doll, telling a creepy little girl to kill her family. But this time, it’s on a boat. A BOOOOOAT!!!
A hilariously dubbed Italian-Mexican joint production, The Bermuda Triangle is low on logic and high on ridiculous old-fashioned racism. A family sets out to find Atlantis with a crew of stereotypes, including a black cook character that would embarrass Amos and Andy. Heading the family? None other than legendary actor and director JOHN freaking HUSTON, in a role that one can only imagine he took in order to spend time near the ship’s other most notable passenger, A REALLY HOT WOMAN IN A BIKINI.
Will they find Atlantis before they’re all dead? Will anyone on board even seem aware they’re looking for Atlantis? Find out by disappearing into The Bermuda Triangle with Mike, Kevin, and Bill! (and, y’know, also that bikini woman we mentioned)
This is the tale of a man who transforms into a violent lizard creature whenever he’s in the sun too long. No, he’s not the third wheel love interest in an upcoming Twilight reboot, he’s The Hideous Sun Demon!
The Daily P.O.P. 